In Tears, In Smiles, In Late Nights Dusted with Sugar.

i've got all these words, phrases, thoughts all jumbled up in my head but i feel like i'm having a massive indigestion where the words just refuse to come through, to lie where they're supposed to. very much reminiscent of those english exercises we had to do in primary school, rearranging the chaotic order into a coherent string of thought.

i've never been good at saying goodbye; these farewells happen far too often for my liking. there's barely enough time to appreciate and savor the comfort that familiarity brings before the slate is once again wiped clean. like those dances that people do, going round in a circle, switching partners every minute or two. you grasp a hand that seemed to slide perfectly into yours, as though your hand was made to fit hers. yet no chance to ask her name before she's tugged away by the next change in the thumping beats. these fleeting moments of perfection, how surreal and bittersweet.

it's a well-known fact, the soft spot she's always had for him. he looks, in a way that makes her feel she's worthy. he cares, in a way that leaves her oddly nice and warm. it's the subtle squeeze on her neck as he passes, the affectionate way he ruffles her hair. even in a room full of people towering over her, he never ever forgets, to say hello. he never ever forgets, to hug her goodbye.
so even though he steps out to take a call. even though it's clear as day, the affection in the tone of his voice as he speaks. she breathes easy, because the friendship is enough now she thinks. it's more than enough.

joseph conrad once said, to have his path made clear for him is the aspiration of every human being in our beclouded and tempestuous existence.
that is never more true in this age of a myriad of emotions and fickle dreams. we could all do with a little help from the windscreen wiper every once in a while; just to keep us on track so we don't lose our focus on the finishing line. i might have stumbled and fumbled and strayed a little off tangent along the way, but i'm glad to be back on track now. persevere, jasmin. glorious things come to those who fight for it (:

we played "I've never" late last night into the wee hours of the morning. but instead of shots of alcohol, we had shots of pure, unadulterated bliss...... meaning, sugar. needless to say, i didn't get very much sleep before heading off to work. a perfect start to my last day as a onelegal intern (:
expensive sushi treat from patsy, the IP lawyer. court in the afternoon, which is always fun for me. chocolate and gossip in the tiny room in the corner in the evening, which is also always fun (: and that marks my last day (: